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Roland Byrd

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Failure

Apr 29 2019

Why People Fail And How To Use Failure to Grow

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Why People Fail


Before we get into that, let’s discuss, “What is Failure?” Because when you think of the statement, “Why People Fail.” You’re most likely thinking of failure as a horrible result—where the person gets the worst outcome that could possibly happen from the efforts that they’re putting in.

It’s true, that’s one kind of failure. That’s a massive failure. And it happens.

There’s another kind of failure to notice and be aware of.  And that’s the type of failure that happens all the time. It’s the failure that’s a definite and necessary part of the learning process because we can never learn how to do something if we aren’t failing.

When we try something and it works out differently that how we’d expected, that’s a failure.

Right?

How To Use Failure To Grow

You take the results you got. You figure out what part is working and you keep that. The parts that weren’t working you throw out. Then figure out what you need to do differently, and start either over or build on it. It’s taking what works, remembering it, learning from it, and letting go of the rest.

When someone experiences a normal failure that’s a part of the learning process. That’s okay! That’s just part of the gig. That’s how we learn. That’s how we grow! And when we are learning and growing, then failure’s okay.

Failure is part of the normal learning process.

What about the other failure though, the type of failure that happens when people totally self-destruct? Or when everything falls apart? Or something goes horribly wrong and just totally off the rails?

That’s failure’s a problem. That’s a real problem. There are opportunities to learn from that. You have the ability to take what worked and run with it, and grow and build and figure out what you can do differently next time. And there’s also your ability to completely throw it out and start over. Your ability to be the phoenix rising from the ashes—of your life or the event or whatever happened.

What Causes Massive Failure?

That kind of failure though… The massive failure. That kind of failure comes from a mindset that’s unsupportive of what the person is trying to do. It comes across in things like self-sabotage. That type of failure comes around when the unconscious mind is completely unsupportive of what the conscious mind is trying to do. It can also happen when the unconscious mind forgot to unlearn something that it learned in the past, something that seemed to make sense when it learned it but now isn’t working. And maybe it never worked!

Sometimes, our unconscious minds, learn how to do stuff that never really works. But it fills a need and it’s what we know. So we run with it. The way to overcome that kind of failure is to master your mindset, to start doing things that help support your goals, support your dreams, and support the results you want.

We control our efforts 100

We have no ability to control the results we’re getting. But we can control our efforts 100%. And when our efforts are amazing and they’re brilliantly building on what we want to do, then the results are going to come.

We may get the results we want. We may get better results than we want. It’s our job to make sure we have the mindset necessary to get the results we truly desire. And the way to do that is to start paying attention to what you’re thinking.

How To Overcome an Unsupportive Mindset

This is one of the very first steps. Pay attention to your thoughts. Do your thoughts support what you want? Or are you tearing yourself down? Are you your own worst critic? Or are you your best cheerleader?

It’s good to notice what you’re doing that’s working and what you’re doing that isn’t working. It’s great to give yourself feedback and to get feedback from other people. As you know, there’s a difference between giving yourself positive, critical feedback and being critical of yourself.

What are you doing? How do you talk to yourself?

If you were walking down the street and you heard someone talking to a friend, a loved one, or a stranger the way you talk to yourself… What would you think?

What would you think if you heard someone talking to another person the way you talk to yourself_

Consider that for a moment…

What would you think if you heard someone else talking to another person the way you talk to yourself?

That’s what I want you to work on this week. Pay attention to how you talk to yourself. Start noticing, what you say, how you say it, and the emotions that are driving it.

Always remember, you are the master of your destiny!

Roland

#SelfAware #Awareness #Phoenix #SelfCare #Mindset #Mindfulness #Failure #Success #Champion #Learning #Questions #SubconsciousMind #Empower #Goals #Mastery #MentalGame #Attitude #MentalAttitude #EmotionalState #Motivation #VictimMentality #SuccessMentality #Inspire #Achievement #Emotions #ManageEmotions #SelfHelp #Healing #Results #Mind #MindPower #HowTo

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Why People Fail And How To Use Failure to Grow
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Written by Roland · Categorized: MindSet Mastery, Success, Transformational · Tagged: Failure, Learning, Mindfulness, mindset, Motivation, Phoenix, Self Care, Success

May 25 2012

Are You a Quitter?

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Are you a quitter?There Are Three Ways of Handling Failure.

The first method of dealing with failure is to Give Up when you fail. Yeah, that’s right, QUIT!

This is by far the easiest path. Quitters never have to worry about learning. The can forget growing. When you quit you’re experiencing the only true form of failure. Quitting is also a great path if you’re stuck in a victim mentality.

Why?

Because the victim mentality allows you to place blame for the condition of your life on other things, on other people, on anything but you.

Here’s the rub.

If you’re going to blame other people or things for your failures then how can you ever take credit for your successes? At some point you must accept the fact that you choose what to think and do.

As far as I’m aware, science hasn’t figured out how to place someone else’s brain in your head. So those thoughts and actions came from you!

Guess where that puts the responsibility for your life?

Right on your shoulders!

With that understanding, is quitting really the best option? In the end you have to answer to yourself.

So perhaps this question is in order, “Am I a quitter or a fighter?”

The second method of approaching failure is to Keep Trying The Same Thing Over and Over and Over…without learning from your mistakes…

Many people seem stuck in this mode. It’s like grabbing an electric fence time and again while thinking, “It can’t shock me again because it shocked me last time…”

Guess what? Yes It Can!

And until you start changing your approach it will! The only reason this approach isn’t as bad as quitting is because you might figure out someday that you must do something different if you want different results!

So if you’re stuck in this approach…there’s hope.

Actually, there’s hope even if you’re stuck in the quitting cycle because you are human. That means you have the power of choice. You are 100% capable of change!

The third method to handle failure is to Keep Trying, Learn From Each Failure, Adjust Your Approach and Try Again! Repeat this process until you succeed. (And even then keep improving!)

This is the natural growth and learning process. It’s what children do! It’s what people who haven’t bought into small thinking do! It’s what people who learn their way out of small thinking do!

Think about it. When you were learning to walk, did you give up the first time you fell?

Did you sit on the ground, throw up your hands and say, “I guess I’m just not a walker.”

Of course not!

Why?

Because you really wanted to walk and you didn’t know quitting was an option!

So why would you give up on things today just because they get a little hard?

Right! There’s no good reason! So get back up, get out there, figure out what you’re doing wrong, and Change Your Approach!

There’s a word for this process…Success!

You Are The Master of Your Destiny!

Roland Byrd.

P.S. for methods and processes to create lasting change and success in your life, check out my books.

Copyright © 2012 Roland Byrd — All Rights Reserved

Image By Scott Meltzer (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

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Written by Roland · Categorized: Personal Development, Success · Tagged: Choice, Failure, Persistence, Quit, Quitter, Victim Mentality vs. Success Mentality

© Copyright 2009 - 2026 Roland Byrd · All Rights Reserved

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