Much of what goes on in life is outside our control. You might get hurt physically. Someone might treat you in a mean or spiteful way. But there’s no way to control others. Not really. You can influence others but not control them. So there’s no way to stop others from doing things that you might find hurtful. But no matter what happens, you always have free will. That means you always have the choice how you respond to the crappy things that might happen.
And there’s always a lesson to learn in everything that happens. Two people could be in the same disaster. They could both lose family members. They could both suffer crippling injuries. Yet one of them will walk away a stronger person who helps others, while the other lives the remainder of their life in self-inflicted misery.
What’s the difference?
Their attitude and perception of what happened, that’s the difference.
I know because I’ve lived on both sides of the equation. I spent the majority of my life bemoaning some crappy things that happened to me as a child, things that no person should ever go through. But that a lot of people do. It wasn’t until four years ago that I started learning I had control over my reactions. That was when I discovered that I could take any situation—self-imposed, caused by others, or totally random—and use it for my good. And that simple change in the way I approach life has allowed me to walk through things that would have leveled me emotionally in the past. It’s helped me become a resilient person who always gets back up and gets moving forward again.
You can do this too.
The secret is to approach life as a classroom. Understand that every day is a lesson. If you do something and the results are different than you’d hoped, then figure out what you must do differently and try again.
If someone does something that you feel hurt or angry about, take a step back and ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?”, “What is happening in their life that they feel compelled to treat me thus?”, and “How can I use this to become a better person?”
If something totally random happens that seems unfair or that hurts you, you can ask similar questions like, “How is this for my good?” or “Can I use this event to help others?”
Simply learning to reframe events can drastically alter the course of your life. It changes you from the victim of your life to the Hero of your future. And when you’re the Hero of your future, you can help others too. You can become a miracle in the lives of others.
That’s hard to do as a victim. Victims are too busy trying to keep themselves from drowning to help others.
So you’ve got a choice to make. Are you a victim? Or are you a Hero?
You Are The Master of Your Destiny!
Get “Your Blueprint, Life by Design” here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004E9U8PU
Image courtesy Dr. Joseph Valks
Copyright © 2011 Roland Byrd — All Rights Reserved